Do you ever feel like you are moving backwards?
Posted on: Monday, June 6th, 2011Logically, you know that it has to be done OR maybe sometimes you don’t have a choice. Then again, maybe you go into it “knowing” what to expect, but then discover that “knowing” and actually living it, are two different things. And of course, there are those things that you go into eyes wide open, knowing that it’s probably not the best time, but defying logic and doing it anyways.
For the last little while, I’ve been experience a little bit of all the above. For the most part, it hasn’t been any ONE big thing (thank the Lord), but put all together, I’ve been feeling kind of overwhelmed.
As most of you know, my business has undergone some HUGE changes in the last 6 months. Not that long ago I was a Stampin’ Up! Demonstrator, very SU focused - and loving it. And to be honest with you, there are a lot of things I really miss about it – the biggest of which was being involved in the worldwide community of demonstrators. As I was re-organizing my studio (which I’ll share with you in a minute) I came across a picture from Founder’s Circle which I attended this past September. It was the whole group of us, all dressed in our jammies. It brought tears to my eyes - I now have it sitting by my computer, and not a day goes by that I don’t look at it, and remember. I really miss all of you lovely ladies!
Now, I’m the Creative Director and Founder of Paper Crafter’s Library – a huge membership site for paper crafters, featuring an online library of paper crafting video tutorials. While I absolutely love what I’m doing, and wouldn’t change a thing, I also feel really overwhelmed some days. Never in a million years did I anticipate the overwhelming success of the site. And of course, with that, the massive increase in workload. In the last month I pretty much had to double my staff because we just weren’t able to keep up with the work.
Now I’ve never really offically “hired” someone before. Everyone that’s worked for me has always started out as a friend or relative. I never realized how intense and time consuming the process of interviewing, hiring and training was/is. I keep telling myself that I’m moving in the right direction, and that things often get more challenging before they get better. And logically, I know that this is true, but emotionally, it’s so hard not to feel like I’m moving backwards.
Especially when not long after I finally get through the hiring process, I embark on a whole round of issues with my server and my internet. I was all excitied that I had hired a great video editor in California, without anticipating the issues I was going to have actually getting the videos to him. We Canadians are not as lucky as our American friends with regards to internet. We have very few choices.
Because my existing internet couldn’t handle it, I upgraded to a business internet through Rogers. It was a calculated decision because it was supposed to more than quadruple my upload speed, except that it was triple the price. Which would have been a bit more palatable had everything gone smoothly.
Instead, not even one week into my new internet service, it went down. I would have internet for maybe a few hours during the day, and the rest of the time, I had none. And despite repeatedly speaking with Rogers about the urgency of the situation (I AM a 100% online business after all) – they could only schedule me an appointment for 7 days out!
After spending several hours on the phone, every day for about 4 days, escalating it up multiple levels of the corporation, I got an appointment…5 days out. So, all last week, I pretty much had no internet – other than a few unpredictable hours here and there. It seems to be fixed now (fingers crossed). But the outcome of the story is, that I HATE Rogers. Their customer service is AWFUL! Unfortunately I don’t really have any other options, otherwise, I’d be outta there! So that’s why you didn’t hear from me most of last week.
Of course with our expansion, I had this sudden “need” to reorganize – not just my studio – ’cause that would be too simple don’t ya know – but the whole house! In my defense, it’s been something I’ve been needing to do for a few summers now (the house part), and with regards to the studio, it’s been something that I know will make my crafting life a whole lot easier.
I’m making the move from “beautiful” to “functional”. You may remember what my studio looked like before (you can see it here). I’ve replaced some of that with some shelving from Uline which is very similar to what’s used in warehouses. So far, I’ve purchased and set up two of the shelving systems, but I’m loving it so much (and of I’ve filled them up already), so I’m contemplating buying a couple more.
It’s positioned right beside my work table so everything is readily at hand. It’s fantastic – not beautiful, but amazingly functional! No more digging through cupboards or stacking and unstacking plastic containers to find what I’m looking for. I just pull my bin off the shelf and bring it right to my table, or just grab what I need. Clean-up is also a breeze, because I just dump it back into the right bin.
So, remember the reference to the “knowing” versus “living”? Here’s the culprit:
An adorable, 4 lb bundle of trouble named Ginger – our pom-poo. For those of you that have never owned dogs (and I never have before Ginger) – it’s unbelievably like having a newborn baby! I feel like a brand new mom again! The crazy thing is that when Soph was talking about getting a dog this past March, I told her she was nuts! To quote myself “you’re a mother of young children with a travelling husband – what are you thinking?” Hello pot? This is kettle! Who would have thought that not even two months later, that would be me! I blame my husband though. He caved first. He just couldn’t resist our daughter’s tears and my grandpa’s not-so-subtle hints.
Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love Ginger. But I suspect it’s going to be one of those same things you tell yourself when your kids are driving you nuts – “it’ll be worth it someday!” So far, Ginger has pooped indoors (on the carpet of course) about as much as she’d pooped outdoors. It’s definitely not that we don’t take her out enough, ’cause we’re out a LOT. Ginger will pee and do one poop, and then just when you think you’re okay and you bring her in, not 5 minutes later, she’s pooping inside. GRRRRR!
It’s also a schedule thing. I’m a very focused person. When I get going working on a project, it’s very hard for me to have to interrupt what I’m doing – especially when I know it involves standing outside, sometimes for a half an hour or more, waiting for Ginger to do her business. So that’s taken a lot of getting used to.
I think the “icing” on the cake for me – well the “rotten icing” I suppose, is that with all the “stuff” that’s been going on, I’ve had very little time to create. Art makes me happy. Creating makes me happy. Since I haven’t really had any time to create, it’s made me grumpy…in fact, it’s made me feel like my mojo is buried somewhere in Ginger’s poop.
Anways, enough blabbing! Thank you so much for listening. I actually feel a lot better now 
If you haven’t already, be sure to check out this month’s tutorial and enter your name into our give-away!
Andrea Walford 
45 Comments
June 6th, 2011 at 8:52 pm
Wow… your life is very… totally crazy ! Reading all this makes me thing too ! We all, sometimes, go backwards… Keep up the good work and just want to say thank you for sharing all your great ideas with us ! Can’t wait to see a few scrapbook pages with your pretty little dog !!!
C.
June 6th, 2011 at 9:24 pm
Hang in there Andrea! I love your Sunny Stamping Studio- and I have been as sad as you when you resigned as a SU Demo. I cannot imagine your feelings right now. Keep looking up and it will get better I am sure. You are very talented and I am sure the Mojo is just hiding for a bit- Ginger will help bring it back out. Hugs..from NC.
June 6th, 2011 at 9:36 pm
Oh that’s really too bad all the trouble you’ve been having. I relate to what you said about finding your pic from Founder’s Circl…for me, heart always wins over other concerns. Could I earn more sometimes if I pushed into new areas of rapid growth, possibley, but would my family and my time for me have to pay a price? Definitely…which is why I couldn’t do what you have done. I also just feel for you…you went from a beautiful craft room to one I probably couldn’t create in…how hard for you. I hope things get better.
June 6th, 2011 at 9:36 pm
Wow…your life is absolutely crazy these days! I am so impressed that you have found it within yourself to do all that reorganization. Some day, if you ever have the time, it would be great to see what you have in all those bins! Thanks for sharing your great ideas and your trying times…sometimes ya just need to vent! I am looking forward to your future projects once everything settles down for you.
June 6th, 2011 at 10:17 pm
Totally get what you’re saying Andrea. Glad we could be here so you could vent.
June 6th, 2011 at 10:29 pm
Andrea – you scared me. I was afraid to keep reading because I knew at any moment you were going to say that you were no longer going to be offering the class planners. But, thank goodness, that wasn’t the case! Whenever you have a minute, please share with us what you did with the rest of the house – might want to do the very same thing with mine. Good luck with Ginger
Tracy L
June 6th, 2011 at 11:14 pm
I cannot believe SU has not begged you to come back yet. That is so rotten of them. I think they should ask you to come back and be a demo. It’s the least they can do.
Sorry, about the daily dog troubles. Perhaps, you can leave her out there for about 15 minutes and let her do her business and then let her in. You really have to show her how upset you are when she messes inside the house. oh, another idea is to not let her roam freely in your house but to put her in her crate. That limits where she makes a mess. Usually, they won’t make a mess in their crates. I’m sure you already know all of these tricks.
June 7th, 2011 at 12:09 am
Sounds like maybe that brief internet failure has given you a break from being tied to cyber space. That might not be such a bad thing for a SHORT time anyway. Love your new storage shelves too. Soon Ginger will be house trained and you can unbury from the doo-doo!
June 7th, 2011 at 1:04 am
Crate your puppy too. Often times they won’t go inside their crate. I used to keep mine in a crate in the bathroom, and then later she had free roaming in the bathroom, and then eventually she got full run of the house. She’s pretty good, although sometimes if I forget, she’ll go on the carpet but it is really rare. We also got a doggie door so that’s pretty much eliminated the pooping and potty on the carpet now…
Nice organization! I like the functionality of the shelving. I hate digging through things although it looks pretty, I can’t really remember where I put things sometimes, and then I am digging and digging around looking for that perfect spot where I put something!
June 7th, 2011 at 1:09 am
Andrea? I’m sending hugs from one Internet content provider to another.
Change the details, and your story could be mine. I launched a Web site, got national awards, did live national television, got an international book contract, then another one.
And the devil is ALWAYS in the details. Server issues. Internet breakdowns. Flaws in the business plan.
Just want to say, “Hang in there!” What you’re experiencing is dead-on normal–not that it seems that way to you.
You’re on your way, dear. You’re growing, and what you feel now are the growing pains that NOBODY ever expects when they have a Blogspot account with about 13 daily readers.
My secret? Massages, semi-annual retreats to a location WITHOUT online connect, and a lot of deep breathing.
That, and a good sense of humor. It’ll see you through all these indications that you are a rising star.
Hugs, honey. Been there, done that, and wishing I could smooth your path for you.
June 7th, 2011 at 2:18 am
Andrea,
I too was dreading to keep reading and see that you were taking a break from it all. Thank goodness that was not the case.
You have achieved so much in such a short time, its incredible. You simply HAD to run before you could crawl! let alone walk.
You are doing an amazing job, thinking of you xx
June 7th, 2011 at 2:22 am
I also say that crating was the best thing for our dog too. When they sleep they go in the crate and also at night. Soon as it is time to come out of the crate they are taken outside to pee and do their business…with loads of praise for doing the right thing (I don’t agree with Marietta about showing your displeasure….totally did it with positive praise with my little fuzzbutt) She learned really well, and with it being Summer if you can leave the door open she will learn to go outside quite easily. Consistency is key. She is adoraable! Crating is where it is at! (I only crated her until she was fully trained…and she loved to be in her crate when we were out…felt safe.
June 7th, 2011 at 4:33 am
Hi Andrea
You don’t realise it but you are amazing. What you are doing with the new business is groundbreaking and as with the puppy a bit like having a new baby. Change is hard but it really is moving forward and I promise in a year’s time you will have all the details sorted out and be crafting like mad.
I LOVE your puppy and am sooo envious.
You know how much we all appreciate you and are routing for you so keep being you, remember to breath and make time for YOU and you will be happy and successful in no time.
If Shelli can do it so can you x
PS puppy walkers are a Godsend.
June 7th, 2011 at 7:17 am
Oh yeah I understand completely! My kids do cyber school and last year we were out of internet for about 16 hrs a day for almost 2 months till they figured out the timing was off and it was missing the signal from the satellite. Try to explain those absences to teachers! It’s the only internet we can get out in the country where we live. I have a Ginger too. She is 4 1/2 and will start kindergarten in the fall. No she is not a dog and she doesn’t pee and poop in the house. But for the first 3 years of her life, we were at every imaginable Dr. and the ER a couple times a month. Trust me when I say ‘This too shall pass!’ Take care of yourself and try to relax sometimes. We miss your projects like crazy, but we understand! Hugs from PA. (I have 7 children now and I know all about being grumpy when you can’t create).
June 7th, 2011 at 8:20 am
I hope you are finding time to relax and look after self!!!! Sometimes God closes a door so He can open another one for you! sounds like this is what has happened…. you go girl!
June 7th, 2011 at 9:52 am
I hope you are feeling better soon and I know it is easy to say don’t worry but worrying only adds to your problems without any benefit so it will all work out,here’s a cyber hug,
Eileen
June 7th, 2011 at 9:52 am
Wow, I bet I wouldn’t recognize your studio anymore! And I’m happy that your new venture is working out so well! If you ever need more help, let me know! I miss you guys!
June 7th, 2011 at 10:07 am
Andrea….isn’t it wonderful to have your ‘cyber’ family!! I don’t know what I’d do without my Friends. Venting with Friends is so cleansing.
Girl, you are wonderful. You have your feet planted firmly on the ground.
She smiles when she feels like screaming, and she sings when she feels like crying.
She cries when she’s happy and laughs when she’s afraid. Her love is unconditional.
There’s only one thing wrong with her. She forgets what she’s worth!
You go Girl. We’re here beside you.
And, thank you for all you do for us.
June 7th, 2011 at 10:39 am
Andrea,
I’m glad you posted what you did.. I, too, sometimes just feel so overwhelmed. I totally get getting grumpy when you cannot stamp. I have been feeling that too. I finally just squeezed in a quick couple of cards yesterday just because it was that or I was going to be a bad person to be around LOL. I love the masculine little book you posted on PCL.. love love love it.. and I can’t wait to make one myself! Hang in there.. and your doggie btw is adorable.. and they really do get past the potty in the house stage.. I have a 4 month old puppy.. I know what you have been dealing with. Take care and have a wonderful day!!! Thank you for so much inspiration!
June 7th, 2011 at 11:03 am
It always helps to vent, and we are here to listen/read. Sometimes it makes us feel better too, to know that others who appear to have it all, really do – the struggles of a growing business included.
Take some delight in your puppy. Eventually it will “grow up”. I’m not one to have a dog either, but we have a ‘grand-pup’ that visits frequently. Wouldn’t have it any other way. Through all of this, be sure to take care of yourself.
June 7th, 2011 at 11:05 am
I’m sorry about all the trouble you’ve been having. I hate those “winter” times!
I have a mini schnauzer and she is my child (since I don’t have any ‘real’ children of my own). We trained her to ring a bell when she needs to go outside. We have one of those mini cow bells (the ones people buy to put on homecoming corsages) tied to a string that is low enough for her to hit it when she walks by. Every time I would take her out when she was training, I would ring the bell with her paw and immediately take her out. When she started hitting it on her own, I would always take her out. Now she is 5 and when she gets bored or just wants to sun bathe, she rings it too. It has really been a good thing for us! I hope your challenge with this gets easier for you! Hang in there!!!
June 7th, 2011 at 1:40 pm
I was standing in front of my keyboard thinking of what I would tell you. I’ve read your post. I think I understand what you are going through. It’s like when I moved from a job where I was “competent” to another one where I did not feel I was “as competent” as I wanted and things took longer to get fixed then what I was expecting or wanting. You have been through big changes. In my own experience, it took me about a year to feel more confortable in my new job. Since you have made the move some time ago… it should come really quick! I wish you will be able to find your balance between work and time to play! I wish you the best and will be thinking of you.
June 7th, 2011 at 4:20 pm
They weren’t kidding when they said “when it rains, it pours”. Here’s hoping that you can find away around Rogers (We have Telus, same s@#t different pile). And in 6 months when you’re in your grove again, you’ll look back and go “Whew! Glad that’s over!”
June 7th, 2011 at 4:24 pm
Holy smokes! you’ve been busy. As for your little Ginger, I agree with dianne shiozaki and any others that have said that you should crate her. I even crated my new to me 1 1/2 year old dog Lily when I first got her for about 6 months and it worked wonders for our household.
Your balance will return.
June 7th, 2011 at 6:40 pm
It will all be a bad dream soon Andrea, especially with your new addition. She will surely bring you heaps of fun, laughter & be your own special little helper in time. Love your work!
June 7th, 2011 at 7:12 pm
Hey Andrea…are you still a demo? I think you are the best and I love all your projects and I love you! Take care of yourself! kt
June 7th, 2011 at 7:20 pm
I can so identify with your story. Hang in there! Growth can be challenging. I’m glad you’re growing…just sayin’.
June 7th, 2011 at 8:13 pm
Oh Andrea…I am sorry you are feeling so overwhelmed, but I hope you know how much you are appreciated for all the beautiful and informational things you share with us. Take a deep breath, hang in there, it will all work out.
June 7th, 2011 at 8:44 pm
Andrea, I feel your pain! I’m trying to open a scrapbook/rubber stamp store and it is exhausting constantly running into brick walls! I’m taking a short break from it to regain my sanity, but need to get back at it SOON! I owe some of this risk taking to you – in a good way, so thank you for that!!
On the plus side, you continue to share incredible projects with us and it’s okay that it’s sporadic postings. We all know life gets in the way of our stamping.
Your Ginger is adorable and as a long time dog owner, I promise you it will get better. Just like a baby, in time you will forget the messes you’ve had to clean up and wonder what you did before her.
Hang in there!
June 7th, 2011 at 10:46 pm
Ginger is soooo CUTE! Did you know you can teach your dog to potty on commmand? My brother & I taught our dogs — his a German Shepherd, mine a Pom. It’s a bit of work (and time) in the beginning, but well worth the effort. Here’s how: Everytime you take Ginger out to do her thing, keep an eye on her and as soon as she squats to potty, say “Potty, potty, good potty, good girl Ginger.” It took about a month with my Pom, and now when I take her out and say “Potty, Potty” she sniffs around for a few seconds and then does her business. Of course, as you’ve found out with a puppy, it may mean trips outside every 30 minutes! Good luck.
June 8th, 2011 at 7:00 pm
I sympathize with you! I have never had a positive experience with Rogers myself…
Your new room organization sure looks crafting-friendly. I like the idea of being able to just pull a bin off the shelves and dump things back into it when you’re done. I must make your clean-up a snap – something that’s obviously necessary with a new puppy around!
June 8th, 2011 at 10:01 pm
Andrea I am so sorry to hear about all the trouble you are having! You are absolutely wonderful for sharing all your creativity with us. Having a small dog is like having a kid around, I have a big dog and some days…..
June 9th, 2011 at 12:07 am
Hang in there, Andrea. It sounds like you’ve had a bunch of frustrating obstacles but you’ll get it back together eventually. You’re so creative and industrious that I’m sure it will all work out. Wishing you luck with your endeavors!
June 9th, 2011 at 12:12 am
Bless your heart. If I can offer a bit having had a little dog…I know it is a bit of a disruption but if you set a timer for every 2 hr.s and make sure you have a bed by you so she will be close by with lot’s of treats, I mean LOT’S…little tiny treats they LOVE! It will become a habit for you and she will be easy to train…here is wishing you the best of luck…give her lot’s and lot’s of love and hugs and she will respond to you more than you would think…and by the way she is adorable…I would take her in a minute (my little one would love to have her)hugs~
June 9th, 2011 at 10:07 pm
Hi Andrea…gosh you certainly have your plate full. I completely relate that it seems like if things go wrong or just off they happen at the same time. You seem like a go-getter so I’m sure that you will surpass this rough spot in no time at all.
With this… just a suggestion w/ Ginger. I have 3 dogs, two of which are Shih Tzu’s purchased at the same time …so double the trouble
Crate training has SAVED us! That and training to potty on command as somebody has mentioned before. It was so exhausting the first 6-8 months…but now smoooooth sailing.
Good luck and HANG in there!
June 11th, 2011 at 4:09 pm
Sorry you’re feeling so overwhelmed. Ginger is adorable, but yes puppies are so much work! Love the Uline storage. Hang in there hun.
June 12th, 2011 at 2:38 pm
Funny-you should mention how you are feeling and what you have been up to lately-I was thinking about you and had noticed that you hadn’t created for quite some time and I really miss seeing your type of style of cards-don’t get me wrong I enjoy looking at Sophia’s too and getting some awesome ideas but I just find your style is more of what I like to do! I too can relate to feeling like you are going backwards and how not being able to do what you love or are passionate about makes you grumpy! I feel the same way about exercising and being creative with cards and scrapbooking(basically my hobbies) I too am trying to make changes in my life to incorporate these passions and also trying to start a new business while working full time and teaching fitness classes on the side and raising a family!!! Balance is crucial and one thing I plan to tackle this summer-thanks for sharing and reassuring to everyone that we are all human and we can’t neccessarily do it all even if we feel like multi-tasking is the way to go!!! Take care of yourself and use those breaks with your adorable puppy by going for a walk and clearing your mind so when you get back from your break you are rejuvenated and ready to create to your heart’s content!
June 12th, 2011 at 7:19 pm
Andrea, I’m sorry you left SU, you are such a talented artist. Remember to take a breath every once in a while and don’t forget to laugh, especially at yourself! Thanks for continuing to share your talent with us. Ginger is adorable, just wait and see, she will become “Your” dog.
June 13th, 2011 at 12:46 pm
Wow busy girl you are… this seems to be that time of year. Love your beautiful card. Great coloring.
Like the photos and I’m all about functional! My work space is not “fancy” but it sure works for me too. I’m not a cupboard girl, and I also like the grab and go method! Looks great! hugs.
June 19th, 2011 at 1:00 pm
Hi Andrea,
I love your creative work and I honestly think that you are even more creative since you did leave SU. I am a SU hobbyist, but I am no longer going to stress out over making the minimum requirement to stay in. I have a room full of beautiful SU supplies, and God knows that I love ribbon. Anyway, my mojo is not with me right now and I do hope that it will return.
As for Ginger, need I say how absolute adorable she is?
They have piddle pads for dogs and she can be trained to use them when in the house. My friends dog uses hers all the time while indoors, and they also walk her on a regular basis.
Do take time for yourself, breathe deeply, and you will be OK. You are so very talented and I come here more now than ever before. I would also like to give a shout out to your very creative sis, Sophia. You two ladies are so nice and I enjoy your posts too. Cute personalities.
Always a fan,
Karyn
June 26th, 2011 at 9:03 pm
Just a suggestion, try using puppy pee pads so that when you don’t get her to let it all out outside, she can go on the pad instead of the carpet. They work super and our Chihuahua is trained on both now.
Good Luck
Heidi
June 27th, 2011 at 11:23 pm
Your new little dog is LIKE a child… they become part of the family. I would suggest.. if you haven’t bought a little kennel crate.. get one and crate train her. She will not want to poo in her kennel. We had trained our little terrier that way (a rat terrier…very stubborn), but he will sit and the door and look at us, then go out, and come back to the door and “knock with his paw” to come back in. It takes time, but it works.. Hang in there!!
July 17th, 2011 at 12:15 am
I just saw that Costco has the Whalen bin unit for $109 this week! It’s not as big as yours but it’s a good start for someone with not so much stuff as you!
August 1st, 2011 at 8:00 pm
We miss you too, sweetie!!! But let’s face facts – being a Stampin’ Up! demonstrator was just the beginning of your journey … you turned that chapter into a huge success, and then it was time to start a new chapter. I truly believe you are meant to go far in the crafting industry … your rising star is just beginning to shine, girl!
Don’t let the bumps along the road get to you … you WILL get there; it’s your destiny! Luv ya!
cheers
Donna
September 7th, 2011 at 12:42 pm
Have you looked into Tek Savvy for internet? We’ve been really pleased with their service and prices.
And yeah, Rogers sucks!!